Cloudy day

It's been cloudy these few days.
The weather.
I love it.
It's not sunny and it's a Perfect weather for a journey to the Dreamland.

Kenapa ba kalau saya bercakap mesti ada maksud tersirat ni.
Hurm. Saya mememang suka tapuk makna sebenar hoping that someone will understand it. 
Stewwpid kan. Ya i know. Biarla sia seja yang paham~

And most of the time, only few people get  it.
When i say few, i mean 1 or 2. 

But about the cloudy thing... i really mean the weather. Not my day.
Well..
Even though i have a few discomfort these few days, i still have a pretty good day.

And oh, one of my blessings were temporarily take away from me.
To be exact, one of my just-met-wingless-angel.
(I really hope it's for temporary)
Just when i thought Father God had make a way for me.
Father God, bless her wherever she is.

But it's okay.
I guess now it's up to me now.

Up until now, i've been relying to other.
It's not wrong, but i can't rely on them forever.

But growing up i'm a pretty independent person. Too independent i guess.
I grow up doing things and going to a lot of places on my own.
I wonder where in the world i have so big of a courage.

I've been to a lot of places where i never been too, with not knowing anyone there.
Whenever i went to a new places for a particular period, i always go out alone on Sundays.
Because i wanted to go to church.

I'm beyond happy to say that i finally found the real reason of going to church.
Not merely because of obligation.
Not because for the sake of following my church friend.
Not because wanting to go jalan-jalan after the mass.
(No offence, i really love going to church with u guys, but i do appreciate the alone-me time)

Because i find that it was during those going-to-mass-alone time that i really know what i'm doing there.

For me, it's simple.

Because I really..really..really want to see Jesus.

You know how when you love someone, you wanted to see them as often as you can.
It's hard to describe with word.
So yeah, i am grateful, very grateful for the faith.
Thank you Father God. 

P.s: "Did you go to church because you don't want to go to hell?
Or because you want to go to heaven?"

May you too find you own reason,
aibeh