I'm on my way to believing

It's almost the end of year 2010.

Time really FLY, don't they?

It's even faster than the speed of light, 3x10^8 ms.

And Christmas is around the corner.

Christmas!

The thoughts that sprang to my mind when i heard the word Christmas are:

1. Christmas present (yeh ini memang paling 1st dlm otak)

2. Christmas tree! (supaya boleh decorate2 kunun)

3. Santa claus!! (odoii..ini time budak2 la)

4. Christmas dress and new clothes (ini pun tiap2 tahun misti ada)

5. Makan2~ (ini nda payah cakap la)

These 5 are mainly the thing that were in my mind as a child. I don't know about others, but as a child, i really didn't think much about christmas.

I could have list lotsa other thing but i know and quite sure the only thing that wouldn't cross my mind at that time is :

The birth of  Jesus Christ.

Perhaps it did cross my mind, u know. 

Yes, i am a christian since the day i was born.

But to be honest, i don't really know Him.

U see, i heard this once in one of the Lifefire camp that i joined, by dereck. He said:

The God u know when u are 10, is different from the God u know when you are 15, and by the time u are 20, the God you is dfferent too from the God u knew when you were 10.

Make sense? 

And it was until i came to Labuan matriculation college,

 i guess that's where i started to REALLY know Him more.

And when i came to UMS and joined Lifefire and Catholic Student Group,

i know Him even more, and yes i fall deeply in love with Him.

My life in UMS is where i really know Him and now i'm still searching for more.

And more.

It was worth every struggle to be who i am, to be where i am today.

Dear Jesus, thank You because You found me. 

As i grow older, i realize more of the meaning of Christmas.

I no longer long for new clothes, 

or christmas tree,

or christmas present(but i wouldn't refuse if u wanna give me tho')

what matters to me is that as long as im with my family 

and as long as we are together to spend and celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ,

then it is more than Enough.

may God bless us with the wisdom we need to really appreciate the true meaning of chirstmas.

I know i'm not the one to talk, i'm still on my way to believing.

So let's walk together. And grow together.

Dear Lord, 

U know my hope, my dream, my fear, my wish, my failure and my everything,

but even tho' U know, u still love me.

and i know that U listen to every unheard prayer that's in my heart.

For this christmas, if i were to be granted 1 wish, the only thing i wish for is his healing.

If it is Ur will, then let him be healed.

Please bless him, strengthen him, and be with him.

Amen.

P.s : Dad, please know that i love u even tho i don't really show it. Please get well soon. May God bless u abundantly. 

Amen. :)