It's not broken but it's not whole too.

Emmanuel! Always.

I love this name. Emmanuel mean God is with us.

But I don’t know why I feel so far from U God, recently.

And  suddenly I don’t know what to pray, and I don’t know how to start..

And i know I didn’t pray with my whole heart.

And knowing this but not knowing what to do, just make the feeling of furtherness worse.

I’m hardly worthy, I know I don’t belong there. I mean yet. I’m on my way to believing. I hope that one day when the day come, i shall see U face to face.

But I feel that I don’t belong here either. On earth.

Sigh~ Please la. This feeling bothers me a lot.

Feelings do come and go, isn’t it?

Eventually, this negative feeling will go.

But so does the positive feeling. Kan?

And I can never hold on to this same ‘feeling’ forever..Be it positive or negative.

The same goes for  people. 

People come and go too..We can't hold on to them forever.

But we can cherish the moment we spent, 

and smile and say thanks to the Lord saying : Thank You dear God,for those angels U sent, even though sometime it is hard to spot their wings..and even though somitme they can be the one who hurt u.

And recently i've been thinking a lot.

Having mix of feelings that is confusing me, and is making me feel stupid.

I dislike this ‘feeling’.

The feeling of worldliness.

It makes me feel so far from God.

And sometimes it’s turning me into a person I dislike.

Oh God, help me.. the devil really know how to attack people's weakness.

I know i’m broken, I’m hardly worthy of Ur love, but still.. I know U love me.

And I know U miss me.

Above all, i know U’ll never let me go.

But i know that U didn't accept me because i am perfect kan..

And dear Lord, thank U for the angels U’ve sent to me.

Those beautiful wingless angels. Thank U for each of them.

It’s been so worldliness for me..and it’s been hard.

So HARD.

I miss those time..where i'm able to give my all.. my everything..

I guess i need more time with God.

at least more than the time i spent on facebook.

It's time.

Time to give back to U of the thing U gave me.

And I shall start by facing my worldliness number 1 enemy : Facebook.

Apparently, I’ve been spending more time on Facebook than with God.

So I’ll start by deactivating my facebook account.

I’ll activate it only when I’m ready. When would that be? 1 hour? 1 day? 2 day? 3 months?

Wish me luck, peeps!

Or better, remember me in Ur prayer.

As I will pray for u.

Jesus loves u.. Have a blessed day.